2013 has brought a yearning in me. I want to enjoy my life again. I want to smile genuinely, look forward to something, feel contentment, and be at ease. The trouble is that I have forgotten how to do these things. I have been so unhappy for so long that everything is a burden, my worries overwhelm me and, though I am lonely as hell, I want to be left alone.
A voice inside me tells me that it is a hopeful sign that I want things to be different.
Since I don't know how to get to the place I would rather be, I have decided to just journey and hope I wind up there. My journey is going to be reading all that I can on changing my outlook, healing my wounds, forgiving those who have hurt me, finding my faith in God again, and moving toward my goals. At this time I cannot afford a therapist, so I will cull the Internet for articles, quotes, prayers and advice and use this forum to comment, journal, and hopefully, grow.
I have to believe that moving forward has got to take me away from where I stand now. Baby steps are better than no steps at all. I just can't remain where I am right now.
I'm so sorry to hear of the passing of your father. You have had a tough time of it these few years. It's wonderful that you're actively trying to move forward. Here are some suggestions that helped me through tough times. Try listening to K-love radio station. It is inspiring and uplifting. Also if you don't already, try joining a local church. Even if it is only to be among others--a sense of belonging to a community. Although I cannot imagine the pain that you are in, please remember that you have a precious life to live. You are worthy of happiness. Everyone has to live his or her life. No one can live it for him. So it is no one's fault when that life ends. It cannot be controlled. So try not to spend too much precious time with so many worries of other's lives and past lives. Live the only life You have. and Praise Jesus! You Live! and every second is another gift from God, and He wants you to live a life that glorifies Him.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your inspiring words. I will take them to heart.
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